AUDIOBOOKZ
Narrated, recorded, and produced by SHAZAM WATKINS, along with any books I have contributed to or edited. I’d recommend purchasing any and all of these works in audiobook and paperback format.
Shazam’s latest audiobook is now available on Audible. “ROSE” by Paul Town
ROSE
by PAUL TOWN
Audiobook by SHAZAM
It features an ambient score, as well as sound FX, screams, autism, and horrifying, disturbing, exotic, terrifying, and immersive narration. I suppose a few words about this book are in order, and to be expected, seeing as I write words sometimes, and when I write words, of course, people end up reading them, even if only a few do, or many, I don't know. This book is a foray into the disturbing and the disturbed. Paul hacks into autism like one blazes a trail in the woods; machete in hand, vaccine bandage on each shoulder, sneezing, and Irish. As usual, whether you enjoy Paul's unique literary voice or not, here to be found are a plethora of laughs (if your IQ is high enough to find them), thoughtfulness (if you are protagonist in your own story), and subject matter so disturbing, that most of your average cup-of-joe's would simply pass over it without the desire to apply deep thinking to any of it, for any reason. After all, what would you do if your daughter was born with autism? How would you feel? It is a possibility, of course, but most of us wouldn't want to entertain the thought for fear it might become real. Out of all of the wonderful things that Paul does (perhaps even what he does most often) is think of things (perhaps in the shower) that most of us don't want to think about (ever), and he makes us think of these things in agonizing, drawn-out, disturbing detail, and he prevents you from escaping the thought itself until you've sufficiently thought about the thought. Of course, he has to think about these things first, in even greater and more disturbing detail than he elucidates within the text, which is, in itself, extremely disturbing. I'll let you discover what the story is about, so that you too think about the things you don't want to think about. Ultimately, I believe this audiobook may be my finest work yet. It was so much fun to narrate (in a different accent), so rewarding to create the sound effects and ambient horror tracks beneath the narration, and it just really is always a pleasure to read and record Paul's work. I'm not exactly sure why I enjoy his books so much, he just has a certain magic, and I think that narrating it is very natural for me. Perhaps that is also quite disturbing. Regardless, I hope that all of you enjoy listening to it as much as I enjoyed creating it.
TOXIC
by JOSH KAYE
Audiobook by SHAZAM
Behold; A New Audiobook be Narrated and Available for All True Lords: Toxic: A Comprehensive Guide to a Healthier Home, by Josh Kaye ( @healthyhomejosh ) and narrated by Mr. Shazam Watkins. I strongly believe in this book, and the work that Josh is doing. It’s a bit different than what you’d usually hear me record, as this work is much more informative, and focused on largely a single a topic: Health and Wellness. You will find contained within, a host of many subjects, including EMF, Water Sourcing, Clothing, Lighting, Food, and more, all with the goal in mind of helping you to eliminate toxins for yourself and your family. I highly recommend this specifically to those with families and children, but if you are preparing for a family this goes for you too. I’d recommend you have your children read this book, or listen to it as well. There is no course language, vain opinion, or brain rot. It’s simply educational, in a very encouraging and worthwhile way. Did you know, for instance, that Berkey fluoride filters only remove about 70% of fluoride, and that these same filters can leak aluminum into your “purified” water source? Did you know that the organic label can be purchased by virtually any company to market their produce, with minimal qualification standards as to what this actually means? Did you know that polyester underwear can reduce sperm count and negatively affect your woman’s woosh? If you would like to know more about how to reduce your exposure to toxins, and to move further away from the world, I strongly suggest you buy his book or audiobook, and glean the wisdom within. Not only is Josh a great writer and thinker, he’s a strong Christian with a family, and a vested interest in the health of those around him. This is also not some prepper tome about how to grow potatoes. It’s a practical instructional book on how to be healthier while trying to exist in the world, and not be of the world. Enjoy, and God be with you.
JOHN
by PAUL TOWN
Audiobook by SHAZAM
One of my favorite books from Paul. This one is a template story, with the template protagonist, and the template adventure that all of us might expect from a great American novel. John, the main character, John Doe specifically, goes from menial and miserable employee, to divorced podcaster revolutionary in the span of 5 hours of recorded audio. His story is inspiring and tragic. It will bring you laughs, likely tears, and you should do your best not to connect yourself in any way to the protagonist, though you probably will. As always, it was great fun to record, and it’s always a pleasure to read Paul’s work, however insane it might seem to people with low IQ. Thankfully, my IQ is very high so I just “understand” it all, I just “get it” unlike most people who might listen to it. I hope you also “get it” because if you don’t it probably means that you are not a part of MENSA, which will be very tragic for you, I am sure. Give John a listen, and you will at the very least have spent money on something important, that adds a whole bunch of weird shit to the world conversation or whatever. I really love this book, and I hope you do too.
IT IS THE SECRET
by PAUL TOWN
Audiobook by SHAZAM
This is nearly 16 hours of pure insanity. Paul is one of the most unique authors I’ve ever read. Kind of like a cross between David Foster Wallace and Marcus Aurelius if both of them had some form of savant-like Down’s Syndrome. I’ve never read anything like it, and I don’t know if I’ve ever had so much fun recording a book. Most of the time with audiobooks, I’m approaching them from a serious perspective, even with comedy. The jokes should be obvious, but with Paul’s work, the jokes are as much a part of the actual text as a part of the writing. For instance, he did minimal editing for the book, so I read almost all of the typos in the final audiobook, regardless of how they sounded. Paul gave me virtually no direction for the audiobook, and I just got to sit down every day and discover how each essay would be read. I used more voices in this book than I’ve been able to use in anything else. Some of the essays are heartbreaking, some of them are hilarious, many of them seem like utter nonsense, but the sheer size of the book and the amount of genius within is staggering, in my opinion. I’m eager to continue working with Paul on several of his other books. I highly recommend you purchase it and support his work. I’d say tackling this one in one sitting would be a brave endeavor. I’d recommend savoring it over the course of a week or two to really appreciate how good I am at narrating. Paul is also a fantastic Twitter guy. I don’t tweet very often, but his stuff is truly great.
HARASSMENT ARCHITECTURE
by MIKE MA
Audiobook by SHAZAM
Mike Ma’s debut novel. A fictional dark comedy with sinister overtones and poignant observations on our current civilization. Entertaining as heck, bold as a sweaty Vietcong whore, funny as can be, and an absolute pleasure to narrate. If you don’t “get it”, you probably won’t. It inspired me to change my diet, begin working out, and affected innumerable aspects of my personal life.
It is strange to say, but I honestly don’t believe I’ve been affected by a book this much in my entire life. Mike has some strange form of prophetic insight while retaining the ability to speak plainly. His vision of the future, weird album reviews, conversational pieces, and situational humor are unbeatable. It is sometimes chilling, sometimes thrilling, and always laced with an untouchable sense of comedy. I’ve always loved Mike’s articles, but this just proved how talented he truly is and signaled a bright future.
Harassment Architecture has sold thousands of copies and is a best-seller multiple times in multiple categories.
GOTHIC
VIOLENCE
by MIKE MA
Audiobook by SHAZAM
Verily, my best work to date. This took significantly longer to get released, as Mike and I had to find time to connect and complete the recording. Tracking began in mid-July of 2021, and I completed all of the recording by late August, or early September. Between September and October I was traveling and looking for a new home. I ended up finding that on the Gulf Coast of FL, where Mike and I eventually met up for a week to record his selected chapters, create the original soundtrack, and add in sound effects and revisions. There are slight differences in the text, as Mike has published different versions of the book at different times. I can honestly say that I’m most proud of this audiobook, out of nearly everything I’ve done. I’ve always wanted to add in music to a larger degree, and include more ear candy for the children. Also, this is the first official audiobook I have completed that was not released through Audible, and sold phenomenally well. Thanks to everyone who has bought, and is still buying. We may release it through Audible in the future, but mayhaps not the same version. This remains to be seen. I hope you enjoy my knighas.
GOTHIC VIOLENCE
by MIKE MA
Edited by SHAZAM
Audiobook by SHAZAM
Mike Ma’s second novel. It continues where Harassment Architecture left off, but in a grander and far more honed way. I love it. Truly. It’s very different from his first, but I think it almost contains a bit more underlying substance.
I think HA was this character ranting at the world and offering vague (though powerful) solutions to the problems, and this new book has come to terms with, and made sense of, the problems he is facing through spiritual and physical evaluation or enlightenment.
There is still humor, but I found myself busting up less often than I found myself saying “Holy shit, so good” which is not a critique. Not only do I think Mike’s writing has improved, I think his vision has become more tangible and easier to grasp. He boiled some concepts down to their base elements. This indicates massive amounts of power, maturity, and stability, while the concepts and style within the book still retain their slightly unhinged and psycho elements.
All around amazing read. I don’t think I can say it is “better” than Harassment Architecture because it is so different, but it’s an incredible follow-up and contains the same spirit. Almost like the difference between the unblooded warrior archetype and the leader of an army who goes home caked in blood to impregnate his wives without showering.
It was an absolute honor to edit the text. The book is a best-seller in multiple categories and I am currently recording the official audiobook, which shall be released this April 2022.